Thursday, January 29, 2009
I am lucky, and I need to remember that. I sometimes get consumed by what I find overwhelming. Money, relationships, my work, my fun, kids, etc., etc. Then I hear about someone else's problems. How sad it is when people cannot appreciate the simple & good in life. The luxury of sleeping late in the morning, having a cute, warm, not fancy at all, home to live in, watching the wood pecker in my bird feeder peck away,. The faces of my children when they accomplish something, the smell of the barn when I visit the 2 nd man in my life ( son 1 st),"Hoy", I can go on & on. I think some people get so caught up in the drama they fail to see the simple things. I am lucky to have a good job in this current economy. I am lucky to have 2 healthy, smart, funny children, who are going to grow up to be wonderful adults, I am lucky to have a supportive, loving family who always make me laugh. Seeing the children in our family growing into wonderful adults, says to me we as a family, have done something right! I miss the companionship of another adult right now. It's just me & the kids. My hope is that someday I will have someone to share my life with & grow old with, but who will not suffocate who I am. I want to grow as an artist and try to do something artistic everyday. I do not want to fight or compete with anyone. I just want to live my life to the fullest. I am the type of person who would never hurt anyone intentionally. I think if people would stop running full throttle and slow down and look around them, they too would feel lucky.
Thursday, January 22, 2009
Is it the grey days and snow covered landscape? Is it because I feel like staying warm and hibernating? I have no motivation! I get up each morning and make a plan in my head and then........I can't seem to get moving. Of course, this then leads me to feel guilty and I will feel bad about my actions. I normally like the outdoors and fresh air but for whatever reason...I just want to stay hunkered down inside wrapped in a blanket. I was going to clean the office/studio today. It is the same as when I moved in 4 months ago. I sat down at this computer to check my e mail, banking, etc. & all my motivation went out the window. I am going to post a picture of my mess and maybe that will give me some motivation to get the job done so the whole world does not think I'm a slob. Besides, I need a clean palette to start working. I want to work on my PMC jewelry. I have some great ideas and need to get them out and not just whirling around my head. I hate wasting time. I get so little free time, then when I have it I don't do anything. Aaaargggghhhh!!! It drives me crazy